The first day of my journey...

Well, God is definitely taking this decision I made seriously and is already teaching me a lot. I am married to a Youth Pastor and I myself serve in a separate ministry. We both work with youth so we can relate with each other when we come home and talk about our days, yet we still don't know "everything" about each others ministries and we aren't able to minister together that often.

When I first moved here, our ministries overlapped alot more than they do now. That is one of the things I fell in love with, his heart to minister to hurting teens and lead them to Christ, and disciple those who knew Christ. I miss those days. We were doing ministry right along side of each other.

So the dilemma is, that my husband does not feel supported in his ministry. It all started tonight when he mentioned that he already had three leaders/parents lined up for an event taking place next month. He then asked if I would come and chaperone too. I said I didn't know, because that is my day off and I know how much they are needed when working in ministry. He was not happy with this response. I was just being honest and saying the first thing that came to my head. I was not trying to be rude or negative, and I thought we could process it together. We fought, cried and talked through it and what eventually came out is that he was hurt by how quickly I came out defending my time off. He would have loved me to start out saying that "I would love to but,.....". The other thing that came out is that he feels sad that I am not able to completely understand what is going on in the ministry because I am not involved, and because of this he doesn't feel supported. This really breaks my heart. I want to support my husband, I want him to know how honored I am to be his wife. I want to do ministry with him.

I am in the process of figuring out how to do this better. I want to trust in God that he will give me the ability to support my husband and still get the rest I need so I don't get burnt out. My friend AJ told me this would happen, that eventually it would be more important for me to support my husband.

Lord please give me the clarity to know how to support my husband better. Help us to figure out where you are leading us as a couple. He feels that we are going down two different paths, because our passions are different. Mine is still for hurting kids who don't know God, his is for the youth group to flourish and grow stronger in their faith. Before I thought it was a blessing that we had these two ministries, but if he is feeling unsupported, me being a wife is more important than working for a ministry. Right? Please help the answer become clear to me. I want to be a better wife Lord. Please help me to not get to down on myself during failure, but make it strengthen and teach me for the next time. Keep leading me Lord.

Thank you, AMEN!

Our new pup Ponty.

I thought I would introduce Ponty to you all. He is sitting here at work with me today.

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Why I'm here....

Hey everyone! Welcome to this blog. I am here to share with you my thoughts, feelings, experiences, failures and successes about striving to become a woman that is closest to the woman in Proverbs 31. She is describle to be "worth more than rubies." Who doesn't want to be described that beautifully?! Please read Proverbs 31:10-31 to be able to really understand who this woman was. I hope as readers you will be able to see a real honest womans journey in asking God to change her into becoming more like this woman. This endevour is for God, for my husband and for my future children. Please pray with me as I continue on this journey and as I write my thoughts down.

We as wives are called to be a women that encourage our men and not tear them down, we are called to be the light of Christ in our homes, we are called to lean on God to fill our needs and breakaway from societies view that our men are going to fill every dark and sad void in our aching hearts.

Whether you know God or not, I hope this blog will help you as much as I think it will help me process the thoughts and feelings I have day to day. I hope my experiences will help you feel that you are not alone, and I hope that you will share the same with me. :) No one likes to feel alone. 

Thank you for reading!